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“I found my mind turning increasingly to illness, to the end of promise, the dwindling of the days, the inevitability of the fading, the dying of the brightness. Blue nights are the opposite of the dying of the brightness, but they are also its warning,” she writes.

And later: “I was no longer, if I had ever been, afraid to die: I was now afraid not to die.”

New York Magazine sent by Avi

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