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Anyone who likes, you know… the INTERNET knows that the Ryan Gosling “Hey Girl” meme doesn’t get old. Pictures of Ryan saying sensitive made-up things just continue to be funny after other memes have come and gone.

I wanted to do some “Hey Girl” death-sensitive memes last year, but it wasn’t right. But this morning I found pictures of Ryan and this memento mori skeleton woman and all I want to do is Photoshop things on them like, “Hey Girl — I bought a double burial plot because forever isn’t long enough to decay next to you.”

One time I was at Scoops, an ice cream place in East Hollywood. They have a flavor called Brown Bread — which is vanilla and caramel and Grape-Nuts and it’s ridic delicious. My friend Ernestine, who works there, nicely scraped out the last of the evening’s Brown Bread for me. Seconds later, in swoops Ryan Gosling. He looks down at the flavors and says, “Do you have any more Brown Bread?” They didn’t. He looked sad and left with no ice cream. I hung my head in shame and ate my Brown Bread. This story isn’t really about anything except that I stole Ryan Gosling’s ice cream and I feel kinda bad about it.

Any suggestions for Ryan Gosling “Hey Death” phrases?

Images via Esquire Magazine.

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